Origins of 2 dollar

Not sure why you’re here? Well, I’m not sure why I’ve created a blog, but thank you for perusing. If you know me then you’re probably prepared for some rather strange, twisted and at times psychologically taxing random musings. If we’ve never met, please don’t judge me by the strange babble that transfers through my finger tips, tickling the Dell for all the world to see.

“Two Dollar Kevin’s Two Dollars worth.” WTF??  SUNY Delhi 1992, a strange, wonderful time of my life in a single traffic light town in upstate NY. It was my freshman year, first time living on my own and in a long term/ long distance relationship . Prior to dorm life in Murphy Hall, I was drinking Old English 800 40oz bottles like there was no tomorrow and rap music was my chosen musical genre alongside my long love of punk, alternative rock and techno.

On the morning of September 12, 1992 I woke up with horrendous abdominal pain. I basically crawled to the nursing infirmary only to find that they didn’t open for at least another half hour. Basically curled up on the front steps and waited for 8am opening time. I was seen by the school nurse who listened to my list of symptoms and quickly diagnosed me as “constipated.” There was no way in hell that this feeling of death was caused by a plugged up pooper and I begged her to send me to the hospital. She did. The doctor at the local ER pressed down on what is called “McBurney’s Point” on the right side of the lower abdomen and asked me if I felt any pain. I replied that I did not; he waited a few seconds and released. I’m pretty certain that I screamed as he released. He informed me that I would have to undergo surgery to remove my appendix asap and asked me to call my family. Dialed “Wordmaster’s” the direct mailing company my Mom worked, she answered and put me on hold. I fell back into the gurney and the doctor waited on hold. He informed my mother of the situation and off I went to get prepped.

Where am I going with all this?! Onwards………..

A week out of the hospital, it was a gorgeous fall day, 70 degrees and it seemed like the entire campus was outdoors. I was sitting on one of the 2 large flower planters directly in front of my dorm watching a few skaters ollie over boards. I walked up to one of the guys, a Tony Hawk hair styled dude wearing slacks and Airwalk sneakers and asked to borrow his board. I ollied 2 boards no problem but kept falling when I attempted 3. Frustrated and exhausted I handed the board to the skateboarding slacks guy and said, “It might be these staples in my stomach” as I lifted my shirt revealing my week old sutures. That was the day I met Dan, one of my best friends to this day and along with my buddy Matt they gave me the nic name “Two Dollar Kevin.”

Dan was my first straight edge friend and a far cry from my fellow boozers in Long Island. My roommate at the time, Chris R. from Syosset was a total tool. Our room was down on the first floor of Murphy Hall. Chris had a repulsive habit of squeezing his zits, and there were many (looks like someone lit his face on fire and stopped it out with cleats) leaving the remnants on our shared bedroom mirror. His choice of sleepwear consisted of Umbro soccer shorts, which housed both his hands behind the drawstring, sans t-shirt. Without fail, I’d wake up every morning and the entire room reeked like fried chicken. I’d come home late at night, lay in my bunk bed across the room from Chris and I’d throw pennies at him as he slept. The reason for this was when I made contact, he would sit up while still sleeping and start talking!

Dan (DJ Grinch) and Matt (DJ Garbage Man) where both DJs for the college radio show WDTU. Like I said earlier, there wasn’t a whole lot to do in Delhi, especially when you don’t drink/ do drugs and your girlfriend is 120 miles away. We would often find ourselves at the local Mobil Mart buying cigarettes, Pepsi and scratch off lotto tickets. Our preference being “Lucky 7s.” One night Matt won $34, Dan won $12 and I won…….. get ready…. 2 dollars. Being that they both had cool radio names and I wasn’t yet a DJ, I became 2 dollar Kevin. A few months later I became DJ TDK.